She’s baaaaaack… She Think’s I’m… WHAT?!, Uh, OOOPS

She’s baaaaack…
I’m not sure what the random whim was that caused me to do it, but I txted Tammy, and said “Hey – let’s go have lunch.  How’s chinese sound?”
So we met up for lunch.  There are reasons why I don’t spend much time with Tammy anymore, and definitely don’t pursue the situation romantically.  There’s actually two specific reasons – not to be revealed here though.  A small handful of people know the truth, and it’s gonna stay that way – I don’t tell other people’s stories, unless I have a really good reason.
Over time, the txting we’ve done has gotten less and less, until it dwindled to almost nothing – maybe a message or two a month.  It was sort of odd, but oh well – people do that sometimes.
Anyway, I get there 2 minutes late.  She got there 15 minutes early.  Uh, wait… what?  There’s only one reason why Tammy would be early – she would have had to have changed one of those things about her life.  I sit down and join her, and we start talking, and she points out I’ve lost weight and look a lot better.  
We get up to grab food from the buffet, and as we’re coming back to the table, she starts telling me how much better I look – really emphatic about it.  That’s kind of flattering coming from her – though she’s a bit biased.
Yes, she made a major life change – a few of them actually, including moving – starting over a month ago.  She’s trying to change the final one of those objections I have (which I don’t object to because *I* have a problem with it, but… well, fuck, it’s complicated.)  Damned good for her – she’ll have a better life because of it.
We had a pretty good time talking and such, and finally head off to get other things done.  I was home like five minutes when she called, and wanted to get together and chat about some more stuff (business, actually – she’s got a couple of potential web clients for me.)  So we meet up at Starbucks, and chat about it all.
I’m pulling up a website on my iPhone, setting across from her without a table between us, when she says “Davis!” excitedly.  “Hmm?” I start to look up…
Now, most of the time you’ve got between two seconds and a split second when you know someone is about to make an attempt to kiss you.  You’ve got a choice to make there – accept or pass.  No such thing here – I hadn’t even gotten my head up from the iPhone all the way when she kisses me.  Now, kisses between Tammy and I are common – it’s part of our goodby ritual, or even thank you’s from time to time.  
This was most certainly not one of those kisses.
After that I looked up at her, and musta’ looked a bit shocked (well, I was indeed shocked, among other things), and she says “I had wanted to do that while we were eating.”  (And explained a rather comical scenario why she didn’t.)  We ended up nervously laughing and blushing a bit for the next ten minutes.  
We managed to get back on track eventually, and continue discussin’ what we were there for, and off on our way we went.  I still ain’t sure what the deal with the kiss was, but, at the moment it’s not relevant I suppose.
She Thinks I’m… WHAT?
So we went back to txting more frequently again.  Not too earthshattering or anything, just the usual random txts back and forth throughout the day.
So I txt her about a flirt that had happened, and got a really weird result back:
“Davis:  take a good look at urself n front of a full length mirror.Now will you get a taste of what I go thru everyday. Have u been to walmart lately?
Watch how chicks check u out now
U don’t realize it cuz ur not used to being like that.
That’s the price u have to pay for being hot.”
I’m WHAT?!  Uh, yeah, I’ve lost a bit of weight and bulked up a bit, but I’m still far from “hot”.  I’m assuming that she’s trying to do me a bit o’ a favor and improve my self-image.  She should probably pick terms I’m not gonna scoff at, but it’s nice to hear stuff like that sometimes even if it is BS. 🙂
Yeah. I’m good with Foot in Mouth.  Today’s was kinda funny and cruel all at once. 
I’ve been waiting on the release of OS X 10.6 – mainly because it’s a fairly large speed boost for one of the things I use most often: large ass files in PhotoShop (side note:  Used to be customers sent me graphics way too small to work with.  Now?  Way too large.  And I’m having to use PhotoShop A LOT these days.)  For $29, it’s not a bad upgrade.
So I head down to Haddock computer, and get my copy.  And they are giving away free T-Shirts for the launch day.  Oh, uh, OK, whatever – I’ll take my free T-Shirt.
“What size are you?”
He looks at the stack.  Now, this is a big guy – probably a XXL or XXXL shirt.  ANd yeah, it’s all fat.  
He notices there’s only one XL left, and comments they are going fast – there’s lots of S, M, L’s left though.  I pop off with “Well, it’s ’cause of all of us fat guys.”  And patted my stomach.
Which, uh, doesn’t stick out like it used to.  I’m not slim and trim yet, but I’m not really classified as fat anymore either.  And it just happens I’m wearing one of my black form fitting workout shirts.  He turns around, and says “Yeah, I…”  Looks at me, and his face kinda goes blank, then he just turns away from me.
I’m not sure if he decided I was an asshole or a lunatic.  Either way, it was a fine “foot in mouth” moment for me.  And a reminder – I don’t look like I did six months ago.  
Now I just need to keep going – now that I’ve got my room settled, I’ve resumed my workouts again.  I’ve been slowly continuing to reduce my calorie intake until I find the happy medium (I don’t want to drop too low, or I end up cannibalizing muscle and triggering “starvation mode”, but I want to drop just low enough to keep a slow loss in fat.)  And while I’m not at my goals yet, sloooowly I’m getting there.  I’m fine with slowly – I’m in this for the long game.  Fuck, who knows, maybe someday I might actually make it to “Hot” 😉  (OK, not really that likely, but I can dream 😉

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